Happy 100th Post.
I have finally found peace in senseless writing.
Notice that I did not mention joy.
Writing is not joyful. It is a chore that, when used properly, brings peace.
Or perhaps it is because I have sold my privacy rights to a piece of paper called The Degree, and when coupled with the memories of late night slogging, the joy of writing slowly disintegrates.
But blogging remains unaffected. It is a world on its own. It is separate, distinct and solely mine. I am the writer, the critique, the copy editor, the designer, the photographer, etc. No rules apply to my writing.
Just because of what you are, I managed to keep a small piece of joy, my precious, to be safely secured within me, until my blogging world ends.
Happy Posting... my 67/100.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
Welcoming Mr. Fox
Guess which VIP came to OU today?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Vicente Fox!
.
.
.
.
.
.
The Former Mexican President!
Isnt it amazing that OU's president Boren personally asked Mr. Fox to come and speak about "issues" that I have no clue about.
(I am just attending for the pictures for photojournalism class and besides, I didnt have enough time to stay and listen to his "speech" because I was rushing for my next class that starts in half an hours time.)
Being the J student that I am, I signed up with the media table and received a media tag that allowed me access to take pictures!
I stayed for half an hour, took lots of pics, and left quickly for my class.
Below is an article taken from my college's website, written by Breance Thomas for The Oklahoma Daily (college newspaper).
Vicente Fox, former Mexican president, will be the keynote speaker at an academic convocation at 4 p.m. today in Catlett Music Center.
Fox will speak along with OU President David L. Boren at a President’s Associates reception and dinner later in the evening.
Daniel Reches, University College freshman, said he plans to attend Fox’s speech because he admires Fox for being the first member of an opposition party to be elected in more than 70 years.
Fox, a member of Mexico’s conservative National Action Party, was elected in 2000.“He’s really such a revolutionary figure, and he just seems like a very charismatic person,” Reches said.
“He was one of the first Mexican presidents to look first to the Mexican people, then to foreign influence in making decisions,” Reches said.
During his presidency, Fox lobbied the U.S. government to legalize the millions of undocumented migrants living in the U.S., including those who are Mexican.
Franz Zenteno, economics and international and area studies senior, said U.S.-Mexican relations should be discussed, as well as the economic and social state of Mexico.
Fox helped achieve the lowest unemployment rate in Latin America and controlled inflation and interest rates during his tenure, according to a press release.
“He should talk about … the goals, the tasks he hopes will develop there,” said Zenteno, who said he will bring the Peruvian flag to the speech to represent his heritage.
Fernando Sarmiento, architecture senior, said he hopes Fox addresses immigration issues. During Fox’s presidency, Mexico pushed negotiations to address the problems of illegal immigration to the United States.
In a measure known by the Fox administration as “The Whole Enchilada,” Fox’s administration said the U.S. should address the rights of undocumented immigrants, mutual border problems and the development of regions in Mexico from which most migrants leave.
“Clearly, the relationship between the United States and Mexico is critically important to our country,” Boren said in a press release. “I can think of no one who can provide greater insight into future development of Mexico and the Americas than Vicente Fox. It is a great privilege for the university to host such a distinguished visitor.”
Fox studied business administration and management at Ibero-American University in Mexico City, according to the release. He began working at Coca-Cola as a route supervisor, and over the next 15 years, Fox became company president for Mexico and Latin America.Fox was elected to the Mexican Congress in 1988 and was elected governor of the Mexican state of Guanajuato in 1995.
Fox and his wife, Marta Sahagun de Fox, have been invited to participate in a series of conferences in the U.S., in cities such as Los Angeles and Phoenix, according to the release.
“This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, to see the former president of Mexico,” Sarmiento said.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Vicente Fox!
.
.
.
.
.
.
The Former Mexican President!
Isnt it amazing that OU's president Boren personally asked Mr. Fox to come and speak about "issues" that I have no clue about.
(I am just attending for the pictures for photojournalism class and besides, I didnt have enough time to stay and listen to his "speech" because I was rushing for my next class that starts in half an hours time.)
Being the J student that I am, I signed up with the media table and received a media tag that allowed me access to take pictures!
I stayed for half an hour, took lots of pics, and left quickly for my class.
Below is an article taken from my college's website, written by Breance Thomas for The Oklahoma Daily (college newspaper).
Vicente Fox, former Mexican president, will be the keynote speaker at an academic convocation at 4 p.m. today in Catlett Music Center.
Fox will speak along with OU President David L. Boren at a President’s Associates reception and dinner later in the evening.
Daniel Reches, University College freshman, said he plans to attend Fox’s speech because he admires Fox for being the first member of an opposition party to be elected in more than 70 years.
Fox, a member of Mexico’s conservative National Action Party, was elected in 2000.“He’s really such a revolutionary figure, and he just seems like a very charismatic person,” Reches said.
“He was one of the first Mexican presidents to look first to the Mexican people, then to foreign influence in making decisions,” Reches said.
During his presidency, Fox lobbied the U.S. government to legalize the millions of undocumented migrants living in the U.S., including those who are Mexican.
Franz Zenteno, economics and international and area studies senior, said U.S.-Mexican relations should be discussed, as well as the economic and social state of Mexico.
Fox helped achieve the lowest unemployment rate in Latin America and controlled inflation and interest rates during his tenure, according to a press release.
“He should talk about … the goals, the tasks he hopes will develop there,” said Zenteno, who said he will bring the Peruvian flag to the speech to represent his heritage.
Fernando Sarmiento, architecture senior, said he hopes Fox addresses immigration issues. During Fox’s presidency, Mexico pushed negotiations to address the problems of illegal immigration to the United States.
In a measure known by the Fox administration as “The Whole Enchilada,” Fox’s administration said the U.S. should address the rights of undocumented immigrants, mutual border problems and the development of regions in Mexico from which most migrants leave.
“Clearly, the relationship between the United States and Mexico is critically important to our country,” Boren said in a press release. “I can think of no one who can provide greater insight into future development of Mexico and the Americas than Vicente Fox. It is a great privilege for the university to host such a distinguished visitor.”
Fox studied business administration and management at Ibero-American University in Mexico City, according to the release. He began working at Coca-Cola as a route supervisor, and over the next 15 years, Fox became company president for Mexico and Latin America.Fox was elected to the Mexican Congress in 1988 and was elected governor of the Mexican state of Guanajuato in 1995.
Fox and his wife, Marta Sahagun de Fox, have been invited to participate in a series of conferences in the U.S., in cities such as Los Angeles and Phoenix, according to the release.
“This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, to see the former president of Mexico,” Sarmiento said.
Heads up! Get ready for more exciting news happening straight at OU!
Yes, there is more... Coming soon!
Chores
I cleared my table.
I sort out my papers.
I vacuumed the floor.
I mopped the floor.
I scrubbed the bathroom.
I organized the dish dryer.
I watch a movie, aka The Myth.
I didnt do my homework.
What's new?
I sort out my papers.
I vacuumed the floor.
I mopped the floor.
I scrubbed the bathroom.
I organized the dish dryer.
I watch a movie, aka The Myth.
I didnt do my homework.
What's new?
Saturday, February 24, 2007
The Holiday
The Holiday - A romantic, cheesy, corny, hot, sad, happy movie. The Union was showing it. I caught the movie at 10pm, only after eating attending The Chocolate Factory and Late Night Snacks. Oh I assure you, you dont want to miss the Chocolate factory, when your mouth get to feast on everything brown.
Back to THE HOLIDAY. The movie was fantestic. It pulled me in right at the beginning and I lived through it all till the end. There is the sexy, mysterious Jude Law, the hyper Cameron Diaz, the down-to-earth Titanic Kate, and comedian Jack.
PLS: Jude Law and Ewan McGregor are the sexist men on Earth.
The soundtrack is great too.
So, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
Pls 2: I dont know how to put up a shout box. Any advise?
Back to THE HOLIDAY. The movie was fantestic. It pulled me in right at the beginning and I lived through it all till the end. There is the sexy, mysterious Jude Law, the hyper Cameron Diaz, the down-to-earth Titanic Kate, and comedian Jack.
PLS: Jude Law and Ewan McGregor are the sexist men on Earth.
The soundtrack is great too.
So, let go
Jump in
Oh well, what you waiting for?
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
So, let go
Just get in
Oh, it's so amazing here
It's all right
'Cause there's beauty in the breakdown
Pls 2: I dont know how to put up a shout box. Any advise?
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Ray of Light
(Wed, 2/21, 4:45p.m.)
I was standing in the Gaylord Computer Lab, greeting my friend.
As I stepped to my left, a ray of light hit me in the face.
I was blinded. I tried to look away, but strangely, I didnt know how.
It was profound.
I faced the carpeted floor, shedding my eyes from the onslaught of the sun rays. Finally, I took a step back.
In the midst of my confusion, it dawned upon me - Summer was coming.
I was standing in the Gaylord Computer Lab, greeting my friend.
As I stepped to my left, a ray of light hit me in the face.
I was blinded. I tried to look away, but strangely, I didnt know how.
It was profound.
I faced the carpeted floor, shedding my eyes from the onslaught of the sun rays. Finally, I took a step back.
In the midst of my confusion, it dawned upon me - Summer was coming.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Spot check
The Ang Mo Head SA aka, my superior, dropped by my lab and hung a sign on the door. He took a few steps forward and peeped into a computer lab connected next to mine, which is also under my care. He walked slowly towards me, looking at the all the computers and chairs.
I minimised blogspot.
"Hey," He said.
"Hey," I replied. "What are you doing?"
"Spot check." He bend down and reached under my desk. He grabbed a folder and glanced through it.
I sat in my chair, like a smiling robot.
After he returned the folder to its original position, he continued checking the computer chairs to make sure they were pushed in.
Finally he left the room with a "See you later."
I maximised blogspot and suddenly, he returned. Before I could do anything, he was staring at my computer screen.
Luckily, there was only one scentence written and since he came back so fast, I havent had the chance to write about him.
"Opened up K drive." He said.
I pressed the window explorer icon instead. I realized my mistake and clicked on the desktop icon.
A minute later, he left for good, with a paper in his hand.
I got up and examined the lab. Two chairs were pushed out. One on the far end - obviously, I was too lazy to push it in. Another chair was pushed out in the middle of the lab. I stared stupidly at it and came to the conclusion that it was OK... A bag was on the table and the screen was logged on, but the owner was gone...but, she will also be back...
Hmm...I dont think I will get a demerit point for not pushing in chairs, will I?
Interesting Facts:
~ The more I sleep, the sleepier I get.
~ I spread tuna on the bread slowly this morning, ran to the bus stop, caught the latest 825am bus and reached class just to find the door locked. Conclusion: I'm late.
~ I am sleeping on the job.
I minimised blogspot.
"Hey," He said.
"Hey," I replied. "What are you doing?"
"Spot check." He bend down and reached under my desk. He grabbed a folder and glanced through it.
I sat in my chair, like a smiling robot.
After he returned the folder to its original position, he continued checking the computer chairs to make sure they were pushed in.
Finally he left the room with a "See you later."
I maximised blogspot and suddenly, he returned. Before I could do anything, he was staring at my computer screen.
Luckily, there was only one scentence written and since he came back so fast, I havent had the chance to write about him.
"Opened up K drive." He said.
I pressed the window explorer icon instead. I realized my mistake and clicked on the desktop icon.
A minute later, he left for good, with a paper in his hand.
I got up and examined the lab. Two chairs were pushed out. One on the far end - obviously, I was too lazy to push it in. Another chair was pushed out in the middle of the lab. I stared stupidly at it and came to the conclusion that it was OK... A bag was on the table and the screen was logged on, but the owner was gone...but, she will also be back...
Hmm...I dont think I will get a demerit point for not pushing in chairs, will I?
Interesting Facts:
~ The more I sleep, the sleepier I get.
~ I spread tuna on the bread slowly this morning, ran to the bus stop, caught the latest 825am bus and reached class just to find the door locked. Conclusion: I'm late.
~ I am sleeping on the job.
Habor Layout
As you can see, I finally have some time to myself, and what do I waste it on?
Blogspot.
Makes me think if I ever bother to put some effort in studying.
At this rate, with my zero interest and effort in studying, I will live a half life of unfufilled dreams.
Interesting Happenings:
~Sprayed anti-bacteria into my shoes, on the couch, my blanket and the bottom of my bedsheet.
~Gave up on a J.fight during class.
~Thinks setting up a family blog will be disasterous. The whole family, including relatives will eventually read it! Caaannoooot...
~Daily life is lacking excitment. How interesting. Wow.
~Maybe I should set up a random blog...for all my random thoughts.
~It's 1:33 a.m. I am still procastinating. To combat that, I designed a caption a week ago and used it as my computer's background. I have uploaded the caption here. It's currently hiding at the BOTTOM of this blog.
Obviously, its not working.
Blogspot.
Makes me think if I ever bother to put some effort in studying.
At this rate, with my zero interest and effort in studying, I will live a half life of unfufilled dreams.
Interesting Happenings:
~Sprayed anti-bacteria into my shoes, on the couch, my blanket and the bottom of my bedsheet.
~Gave up on a J.fight during class.
~Thinks setting up a family blog will be disasterous. The whole family, including relatives will eventually read it! Caaannoooot...
~Daily life is lacking excitment. How interesting. Wow.
~Maybe I should set up a random blog...for all my random thoughts.
~It's 1:33 a.m. I am still procastinating. To combat that, I designed a caption a week ago and used it as my computer's background. I have uploaded the caption here. It's currently hiding at the BOTTOM of this blog.
Obviously, its not working.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Elbows
I scrape my elbows today. Purposely.
I was doing some exercise called the crocodile .... ??
I had to lie flat on the ground and do a butterfly with my hands and pull my upper body up without using the legs. In high school, I never scraped my skin, no matter how many sets I had to do the exercise.
Today, my skin was scraped after only ONE set of crocodile...??
That means I either have soft skin (courtesy of body lotion everyday) or my gig is too hard.
I think the latter. Stupid gig, and stupid locker. It takes me forever 10-15 mins looking like a dork to open up the locker. Luckily the locker room is always empty in the mornings.
I really should start washing the gig WITH softener, but im too lazy to bring it back home ;)
My life must be getting sooo boring if I have to blog about my scraped elbows.
*One the other hand, I have been thinking (for a few seconds) of opening up another blog just for family use.*
"Do what?"
I was doing some exercise called the crocodile .... ??
I had to lie flat on the ground and do a butterfly with my hands and pull my upper body up without using the legs. In high school, I never scraped my skin, no matter how many sets I had to do the exercise.
Today, my skin was scraped after only ONE set of crocodile...??
That means I either have soft skin (courtesy of body lotion everyday) or my gig is too hard.
I think the latter. Stupid gig, and stupid locker. It takes me forever 10-15 mins looking like a dork to open up the locker. Luckily the locker room is always empty in the mornings.
I really should start washing the gig WITH softener, but im too lazy to bring it back home ;)
My life must be getting sooo boring if I have to blog about my scraped elbows.
*One the other hand, I have been thinking (for a few seconds) of opening up another blog just for family use.*
"Do what?"
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Chinese New Year
HAPpY ChINeSe NeW YEaR!!!!
Happines, Happiness, Happines all around, all year, and all second long!!!
Ok. That's it! *^
Back to more IMPORTANT STUFF.
1) Trinity Church CNY celebration - food is so-so. Started off late and I only got through the third show before I had to LEAVE for African Night. Yes, I am that unloyal to my own fantestic culture.
2) African Night is the BOMB! African dances are so filled with energy, you could feel yourself dancing along with them. Plus, the audiences are so engaging, shouting out "oh yea!" or "african dialect..." or even singing along/clapping hands....its soooo good!!!!
3) It helps to know people. Just to get in for free. One event can cost me about 5-12 dollars. Panam parties are forever 5 dollars. But the best part is ...ALL cultural organization presidents get in for free...and since my president and vp is always 99.9% absent for the event, that leaves ME to represent them. Thus, free entrence wherever I go. Life is gooooddd....OHH YEA!!!
4) Go eat and get fat, its CNY!
5) Im not calling home, and dont even bother asking why. Seriously, there is nothing to talk about to my family/relatives....esp relatives. If I think people dont care about me/treat me bad/look down on me/whatever....well, I am of course not going to freaking call back. I will treat them all nice and all when I see them, but that the extend of where my relationships with them stops! I am definitely not going to call back to say "how are you?"
On the other hand, it doesnt help that im so shy and I dont speak my dialect. What am I going to say? I always have to practise beforehand with my brother/or overhear cousins before I can start wishing Happy NY. So...the point is....Im not calling back. They wont even remember me, so heck! And everyone probably knows....i never call back.
I am a very bad daughter... and I cant help it, because I need to break free and I have been constraint to my family one way or another all my life.
Happines, Happiness, Happines all around, all year, and all second long!!!
Ok. That's it! *^
Back to more IMPORTANT STUFF.
1) Trinity Church CNY celebration - food is so-so. Started off late and I only got through the third show before I had to LEAVE for African Night. Yes, I am that unloyal to my own fantestic culture.
2) African Night is the BOMB! African dances are so filled with energy, you could feel yourself dancing along with them. Plus, the audiences are so engaging, shouting out "oh yea!" or "african dialect..." or even singing along/clapping hands....its soooo good!!!!
3) It helps to know people. Just to get in for free. One event can cost me about 5-12 dollars. Panam parties are forever 5 dollars. But the best part is ...ALL cultural organization presidents get in for free...and since my president and vp is always 99.9% absent for the event, that leaves ME to represent them. Thus, free entrence wherever I go. Life is gooooddd....OHH YEA!!!
4) Go eat and get fat, its CNY!
5) Im not calling home, and dont even bother asking why. Seriously, there is nothing to talk about to my family/relatives....esp relatives. If I think people dont care about me/treat me bad/look down on me/whatever....well, I am of course not going to freaking call back. I will treat them all nice and all when I see them, but that the extend of where my relationships with them stops! I am definitely not going to call back to say "how are you?"
On the other hand, it doesnt help that im so shy and I dont speak my dialect. What am I going to say? I always have to practise beforehand with my brother/or overhear cousins before I can start wishing Happy NY. So...the point is....Im not calling back. They wont even remember me, so heck! And everyone probably knows....i never call back.
I am a very bad daughter... and I cant help it, because I need to break free and I have been constraint to my family one way or another all my life.
Where did my Fridays go?
Im just so glad that friday's have come and gone. My paper was due today, and normally, when I would get it done the night before, I was just so sleepy on Thursday that I left my paper for Friday to deal with. Not good. But it still turned out fine, with lotsa minor tweaking.
Panam Party no longer seemed exciting. It's as if the hip factor has been taken out of it. Of course, to others, its great, but its turning boring for me. I need some new excitment. I was thinking of ice-skating and how fun that sounds compared to Panam Party. I must be getting sick.
Another reason could be because there is nothing to look forward to at the Party.
Yet, all in all, im pretty satisfied with today. Shopping sure does wonders.
The advertisment was on facebook. Aisle 7 has 50% discount for all clothings...and its a boutique shop, my favourite. I hate it when you buy something and the rest of the world has it too. It annoys me. So anyway, I got a black and white strip top and a beautiful fairy skirt. Fantestic.
African Queen was tonight too! Got loads of pics...but what on earth shall I do with them?
Heck...
And I must say, another gift is sure surprising but warmly welcome. It's a virtual gift, but hey, as of today, I have four. Beat that!
Panam Party no longer seemed exciting. It's as if the hip factor has been taken out of it. Of course, to others, its great, but its turning boring for me. I need some new excitment. I was thinking of ice-skating and how fun that sounds compared to Panam Party. I must be getting sick.
Another reason could be because there is nothing to look forward to at the Party.
Yet, all in all, im pretty satisfied with today. Shopping sure does wonders.
The advertisment was on facebook. Aisle 7 has 50% discount for all clothings...and its a boutique shop, my favourite. I hate it when you buy something and the rest of the world has it too. It annoys me. So anyway, I got a black and white strip top and a beautiful fairy skirt. Fantestic.
African Queen was tonight too! Got loads of pics...but what on earth shall I do with them?
Heck...
And I must say, another gift is sure surprising but warmly welcome. It's a virtual gift, but hey, as of today, I have four. Beat that!
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Valentine's Special!
I am so happy today...
COZ CLASS IS CANCELLED!
So I came home tuesday night, thinking that I really ought to do some homework...aka...study for test and write papers...but instead, since the next day is V day...plus the added bonus of class cancellation, I fell asleep early (without bathing!) and slpt till 930am this morning, where I pulled myself out of bed only to take an early bath and to eat breakfast! Yea!
Went to school thinking I would actually do something productive given my highly fast paced stressed life...but nooooo....i just filled up some scholarship information form...yea, that's so productive...for like $5oo...and I had to scarifice my tml's A for that...
ok...so i get C's....but A's sounds nicer...
And due to my fantestic sleep...i woke up today feeling refreshed and free...as if all my problems shrank into something really tiny and insignificant...i really need more good night sleep if that's the case...plus, sleep helps keeps the fats off...and is another great excuse for not visiting the gym.
Finally, with no dates and no plans...i came home 'early', more like after work, and found a red rose, with a card stuck on it, and a bag of chocolates! I am sooo happy...just because I have something ... it doesnt matter that it came from my housemate... hey, its the thought that matters... and its a great surprise!
so it finally ended with a little love...
Nice...
*back to really, I swear, studying*
loVe,
Me.
COZ CLASS IS CANCELLED!
So I came home tuesday night, thinking that I really ought to do some homework...aka...study for test and write papers...but instead, since the next day is V day...plus the added bonus of class cancellation, I fell asleep early (without bathing!) and slpt till 930am this morning, where I pulled myself out of bed only to take an early bath and to eat breakfast! Yea!
Went to school thinking I would actually do something productive given my highly fast paced stressed life...but nooooo....i just filled up some scholarship information form...yea, that's so productive...for like $5oo...and I had to scarifice my tml's A for that...
ok...so i get C's....but A's sounds nicer...
And due to my fantestic sleep...i woke up today feeling refreshed and free...as if all my problems shrank into something really tiny and insignificant...i really need more good night sleep if that's the case...plus, sleep helps keeps the fats off...and is another great excuse for not visiting the gym.
Finally, with no dates and no plans...i came home 'early', more like after work, and found a red rose, with a card stuck on it, and a bag of chocolates! I am sooo happy...just because I have something ... it doesnt matter that it came from my housemate... hey, its the thought that matters... and its a great surprise!
so it finally ended with a little love...
Nice...
*back to really, I swear, studying*
loVe,
Me.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
My Perfect Life
I am feeling so depressed.
Interviews, papers, datelines, test, etc.
Esp V day.
I dont even want to think about it.
Go ahead, rub salt into my wound.
Let's see...I seriously dont care that im single.
But I HATE that my week is so filled ... and i have to squeeze in some thoughts for V day, which is highly incomprehensible to me since I will be working most of time... might be the advertisment bombarding me and jamming thoughts of candies, chocolates and loovvee...
Come to think of it, I hate V day THIS YEAR because I have to conduct interviews and scribble off mind-boggling sentences to assemble an essay from nothingness that I cannot even relax on that freaking day.
I JUST WANT A HOLIDAY...any day without being consumed by throughts of work/studies/test/interviews/papers/money/etc.
I want to sleep without setting the alarm clock. I want to stay in bed whole day and lie there dreaming about a perfect life, where I can just sleep and sleep and wake up feeling satisfied and intoxicated from excess sleep, and fall back to sleep again.
Hahahahaha. Yes, I think I just figure out what I really want for my perfect life...at the age of the big-2-oh, no less.
Interviews, papers, datelines, test, etc.
Esp V day.
I dont even want to think about it.
Go ahead, rub salt into my wound.
Let's see...I seriously dont care that im single.
But I HATE that my week is so filled ... and i have to squeeze in some thoughts for V day, which is highly incomprehensible to me since I will be working most of time... might be the advertisment bombarding me and jamming thoughts of candies, chocolates and loovvee...
Come to think of it, I hate V day THIS YEAR because I have to conduct interviews and scribble off mind-boggling sentences to assemble an essay from nothingness that I cannot even relax on that freaking day.
I JUST WANT A HOLIDAY...any day without being consumed by throughts of work/studies/test/interviews/papers/money/etc.
I want to sleep without setting the alarm clock. I want to stay in bed whole day and lie there dreaming about a perfect life, where I can just sleep and sleep and wake up feeling satisfied and intoxicated from excess sleep, and fall back to sleep again.
Hahahahaha. Yes, I think I just figure out what I really want for my perfect life...at the age of the big-2-oh, no less.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Stress
I have been acting crazy these past few days. I eat at night and laugh and chatter to my roommate although at the back of my mind was the nagging feeling that I should stop immediately and do my homework.
The stress is getting down on me. The semester has just started and I am feeling the pressure to finish up assignments and conduct more interviews. I think I can never make it far in my career, not at this rate. All I ever wanted was a simple life, preferably in the cottage with a small garden and no jobs, except for going to events and having fun.
I cant multi-task and I procastinate too much. Yesterday, I spent my entire night writing a story that could be finished earlier...if I only could sit down and write. I dont know what it is about me, but DAMN IT, Im going to graduate, DAMN IT, I SWEAR with a FREAKING 3.6. Shit you! I knew it was the stress and the astrology book that has been playing with my mind.
I need my concentration BACK! NOW!
Let the wind blow away my depression and bring me back to reality. Shit! Damn it. I hate reality, I knew storybooks were there for a reason.
The stress is getting down on me. The semester has just started and I am feeling the pressure to finish up assignments and conduct more interviews. I think I can never make it far in my career, not at this rate. All I ever wanted was a simple life, preferably in the cottage with a small garden and no jobs, except for going to events and having fun.
I cant multi-task and I procastinate too much. Yesterday, I spent my entire night writing a story that could be finished earlier...if I only could sit down and write. I dont know what it is about me, but DAMN IT, Im going to graduate, DAMN IT, I SWEAR with a FREAKING 3.6. Shit you! I knew it was the stress and the astrology book that has been playing with my mind.
I need my concentration BACK! NOW!
Let the wind blow away my depression and bring me back to reality. Shit! Damn it. I hate reality, I knew storybooks were there for a reason.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Horrible ending to what-was-a-great-day.
Im upset and angry, and im feeling depressed.
Firstly, Mr. Got-the-hots was all friendly when I bumped into him during my weekly duties. Later, he turned cold and walked past me. After that, he talked to my friend but left quickly before I could catch him. He blows hot and cold. Guess what? Im pretty mad.
Next, my cousin comes to work and accused me of leaving the building keys in one of the rooms. Oh! Horrors! I replied that Henry went up there later too, so it is probably his fault, but I gave her an uncertain look because I wanted to confirm that it was either him or I! She then started complaining and complaining and complaining about how she always find trouble when she starts working. Fine. Next, she said that someone didnt check the grad lab. Fine. It was Henry's and me's fault. But i was doing my weekly checklist during that time and I was busy that it slipped off my mind.
Well, she started complaining again and later she added that sometimes she forgot too, but she kept speaking to me in that accusing tone that I just wanted to scream! Hello! No one is perfect, and I dont complain whenever she does something wrong do I? No. Freaking No. Because I accept her the way she is.
Her fill-in partner came in 22 mins late when the grace period was 5 mins. She complained again. 22 mins is a long time and she has the right to say something about it. But, she complained and complained and complained. Her fill-in partner called her a "Hissy fit". I believed that was a great word to describe her actions.
In between her complains and Our Great Many Mistakes, Fill-in partner and I were bantering around with a little flirting. She called us "childish" coz it isnt her way of communicating.
Well, then learn! Or cut off the complaining and accusing. I learned long ago not to complain unless I was really stressed out or nervous. It gets me talking about all the bad stuff that is going on in my life. But normally, I dont do that.
So my cousin had a little rough time when she went to work. Fine. I accept that. Unlucky her.
Good things about her: sensitive, caring, generous, helpful, independent. (All that im not)
Bad things: Stubborn. (Totally opp mine)
Comments: I dont like to diss my cousin but she is what she is and overall, except for her dictatorship and stubborness to accept different kinds of people, she is a great person and has helped me in a lot of situations without fail, sometimes even when I didnt ask for it.
Firstly, Mr. Got-the-hots was all friendly when I bumped into him during my weekly duties. Later, he turned cold and walked past me. After that, he talked to my friend but left quickly before I could catch him. He blows hot and cold. Guess what? Im pretty mad.
Next, my cousin comes to work and accused me of leaving the building keys in one of the rooms. Oh! Horrors! I replied that Henry went up there later too, so it is probably his fault, but I gave her an uncertain look because I wanted to confirm that it was either him or I! She then started complaining and complaining and complaining about how she always find trouble when she starts working. Fine. Next, she said that someone didnt check the grad lab. Fine. It was Henry's and me's fault. But i was doing my weekly checklist during that time and I was busy that it slipped off my mind.
Well, she started complaining again and later she added that sometimes she forgot too, but she kept speaking to me in that accusing tone that I just wanted to scream! Hello! No one is perfect, and I dont complain whenever she does something wrong do I? No. Freaking No. Because I accept her the way she is.
Her fill-in partner came in 22 mins late when the grace period was 5 mins. She complained again. 22 mins is a long time and she has the right to say something about it. But, she complained and complained and complained. Her fill-in partner called her a "Hissy fit". I believed that was a great word to describe her actions.
In between her complains and Our Great Many Mistakes, Fill-in partner and I were bantering around with a little flirting. She called us "childish" coz it isnt her way of communicating.
Well, then learn! Or cut off the complaining and accusing. I learned long ago not to complain unless I was really stressed out or nervous. It gets me talking about all the bad stuff that is going on in my life. But normally, I dont do that.
So my cousin had a little rough time when she went to work. Fine. I accept that. Unlucky her.
Good things about her: sensitive, caring, generous, helpful, independent. (All that im not)
Bad things: Stubborn. (Totally opp mine)
Comments: I dont like to diss my cousin but she is what she is and overall, except for her dictatorship and stubborness to accept different kinds of people, she is a great person and has helped me in a lot of situations without fail, sometimes even when I didnt ask for it.
Early Valentines Day!
Today was the day my professor brought some chocolate, candies and two bears to class.
You know when a teacher is really Fantastic when he showers his care upon his students.
Anyway, to repay his generiosity, I decided to pay him back by taking pictures of his goodwill effort in making the class happy.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
You know when a teacher is really Fantastic when he showers his care upon his students.
Anyway, to repay his generiosity, I decided to pay him back by taking pictures of his goodwill effort in making the class happy.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Just Joking! You think im really that crazy? It's my professor! He blackened his car tires and ran the unemotional bear over. After that, he washed the evidence away and left the bear for the whole class to torture.
Nevertheless, its true. My professor did ran the bear over and washed his car and brought the bear to school.....but we the students were very caring...we put it on the paper that my teacher ran over with the bear on top of it and decorated it with candies and heart shaped cuttings. We also took lots of pictures of it...and awww...how cute! As you can see, our class is rather evil.
But there is also another prettier side to us. When there is yin, there is yang.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
'Kiss me, Im Irish.'
Isnt that the cutest thing you ever saw. And of course, we get to eat the chocolates after the pictures are done. Cheap chocolates, but some of them are good, especially when you havent had your breakfast.
Excuse me. What did you say about my weight again? *Stomps my feet and walked away*
Single's Day
What do you suppose I should think about when Mr. Got-the-hots dropped by for a quick hello?
*Saya mau lupa lah…*
But I cant...
Not when he flashed a smile...
"So do you know about Single's Day?"
I gave him a quizzical look and fell silent.
"Wait a minute, Im not single." I replied.
"You're not?" He asked in surprise.
"Yes, Miss R is my girlfriend." I said.
"No, she's not. She just a cover-up." He protested.
Beside me, my cousin let out a snort. I suspected she was in a state of shock when I let out my 'secret' status as a couple.
"What's so funny?" He said. "Ok, I gotta go now. Wish me luck on my exams."
"You still got one more hour. Study and you will get your luck." I said as he waved goodbye and existed out the door.
Let's see...The point of the conversation is???
Sometimes, when I thought I have already renoune my conflicted inner issue or forgot about it, it comes running back to me again. I think I will just wait till next week to figure it out.
On a lighter note, I ran three rounds in the gym today and caught a flu. That is how low my immune system is from spending time doing trivial stuff and procastinating till the last moment to study, resulting in a daily anxiousness/worriedness that could be easily remedied and a 4 hours of sleep when I could be having 6.
This (Blogging, duh) is just one fine example of my trivial stuff.
Oh, the horrors of my beauty sleep, subjected to a daily harsh routine of thankless nightmares and eyebags.
*Saya mau lupa lah…*
But I cant...
Not when he flashed a smile...
"So do you know about Single's Day?"
I gave him a quizzical look and fell silent.
"Wait a minute, Im not single." I replied.
"You're not?" He asked in surprise.
"Yes, Miss R is my girlfriend." I said.
"No, she's not. She just a cover-up." He protested.
Beside me, my cousin let out a snort. I suspected she was in a state of shock when I let out my 'secret' status as a couple.
"What's so funny?" He said. "Ok, I gotta go now. Wish me luck on my exams."
"You still got one more hour. Study and you will get your luck." I said as he waved goodbye and existed out the door.
Let's see...The point of the conversation is???
Sometimes, when I thought I have already renoune my conflicted inner issue or forgot about it, it comes running back to me again. I think I will just wait till next week to figure it out.
On a lighter note, I ran three rounds in the gym today and caught a flu. That is how low my immune system is from spending time doing trivial stuff and procastinating till the last moment to study, resulting in a daily anxiousness/worriedness that could be easily remedied and a 4 hours of sleep when I could be having 6.
This (Blogging, duh) is just one fine example of my trivial stuff.
Oh, the horrors of my beauty sleep, subjected to a daily harsh routine of thankless nightmares and eyebags.
Small Mediums at Large
I have been reading a book..."Small Mediums at Large", a true story by Terry Iacuzzo.
It left my head spinning and shook up my reality because im really easily influenced, especially when my imaginative mind starts churning out images of psychotic events happening in her life.
I love reading. It takes me out of reality and puts me in a fantesy world, where everything cease to exist but the alternated me. It happens all the time and for the long period (until I devoured my next book), I am transported to the my make-shift world.
Im afraid I am being sucked in too deep. I am spinning, spinning, spinning... and im caught in the web of confusion, of being squeeze into a sponge, so full and heavy and lethal. It takes away my ability to function normally in an ordinary situation. E.g. Doing homework.
I am not joking. That's the only reason why I always shut the door when Im reading while I was still High School. My parents would freak out if they see me reading books when I should be doing more important stuff like studying. And the readings never stop, they continue on through the night, into the next day, or until it satisfy my curiosity, before I picked up another book. It is an endless cycle, and always insatiable. It slowly stopped after I moved out of my parents house and into a realistic world called college, careers-you-have-to-think-about, and libraries of enclycopedia.
Nevertheless, I would definitely recommand the book if you enjoy reading True Stories. If fantesy makes you salivate, if reading minds, seeing the future, encountering ghosts, angels, and living a life in a family of high magicians in their past lifes interest you.
I think I should stay away from True Stories for a while. They demand so much attention from you, and presents you with a different view of the world, thats shakes up your comfort zone. It's like telling you, "Harry Potter is real". He's not but Terry and her world IS.
That is the dangerous part.
Be sane and or you will lose part of yourself. Imagine but keep one foot stationed in reality.
Bisous.
pls: I have been looking up FREE astrology reports on the internet for fun...the harmless things that used to occupy my hours when I was younger and bored and without a blog. The reports turned out to be fairly accurate, especially if you have your birth time. It wouldnt hurt to try some for fun.
www.astrology.com
Try the below link.
http://my7s.astrology.com/scripts/runisa.dll?AO.5701830:FREEPERSONAL:522212228.585
It left my head spinning and shook up my reality because im really easily influenced, especially when my imaginative mind starts churning out images of psychotic events happening in her life.
I love reading. It takes me out of reality and puts me in a fantesy world, where everything cease to exist but the alternated me. It happens all the time and for the long period (until I devoured my next book), I am transported to the my make-shift world.
Im afraid I am being sucked in too deep. I am spinning, spinning, spinning... and im caught in the web of confusion, of being squeeze into a sponge, so full and heavy and lethal. It takes away my ability to function normally in an ordinary situation. E.g. Doing homework.
I am not joking. That's the only reason why I always shut the door when Im reading while I was still High School. My parents would freak out if they see me reading books when I should be doing more important stuff like studying. And the readings never stop, they continue on through the night, into the next day, or until it satisfy my curiosity, before I picked up another book. It is an endless cycle, and always insatiable. It slowly stopped after I moved out of my parents house and into a realistic world called college, careers-you-have-to-think-about, and libraries of enclycopedia.
Nevertheless, I would definitely recommand the book if you enjoy reading True Stories. If fantesy makes you salivate, if reading minds, seeing the future, encountering ghosts, angels, and living a life in a family of high magicians in their past lifes interest you.
I think I should stay away from True Stories for a while. They demand so much attention from you, and presents you with a different view of the world, thats shakes up your comfort zone. It's like telling you, "Harry Potter is real". He's not but Terry and her world IS.
That is the dangerous part.
Be sane and or you will lose part of yourself. Imagine but keep one foot stationed in reality.
Bisous.
pls: I have been looking up FREE astrology reports on the internet for fun...the harmless things that used to occupy my hours when I was younger and bored and without a blog. The reports turned out to be fairly accurate, especially if you have your birth time. It wouldnt hurt to try some for fun.
www.astrology.com
Try the below link.
http://my7s.astrology.com/scripts/runisa.dll?AO.5701830:FREEPERSONAL:522212228.585
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Panam Twin Party.
I have to admit....Panam's party is the BEST!!!
In fact, its sooo good, people have to wait in line for more than half an hour just to enter.
Friday Night. Panam Twin Party.
My friends and I went as triplets just coz we could. We were wearing a tube top and a bareback cheong sam top. With jeans.
I was wearing slippers...while the two were wearing shoes.
Since the two friends of mine were watching Borat for free in the Union, we ended up reaching the party at 12 plus...and we didnt get in until ONE a.m....My toes were freezing...and numbed. I tried rubbing them with my feet but they remained cold. Plus, I was wearing a weave sweater so when the wind blows, my entire body shivered. I swear I must be the dumbest person in my group but hey, I wasnt ready to risk my other jackets to the mercy of the cigeratte smoke smell.
At first, the four pretty girls (one from japan) thought we could go in asap, since my friend, Ms R, had lots of connections. However, it turns out we have to push ourselves in. We ignored the long line gathering outside and strode towards the door. Unfortunately, there was only one line. The fast lane had closed. It turns out that the club had reached its maximum capacity. Thus, unless some people were going home, all of the latecomers were destined to wait outside...with or without our coat, and with or without shoes.
Thus, we got in after half an hour with only one hour left to spare for dancing. The dance floor was so crowded, you could barely pushed yourself forward. There were two stage. We danced on top of one, only because it is a known fact that you get more space up there and thus, more privacy. Of course, we werent facing the dance floor, we were hidden by another 4 lines of people dancing and were facing the drinking section, which had piles of bottles piled up. A photographer walked past, taking pictures of anyone. He turned his camera towards me, and there was a flash of light. Another time, he motioned for my partner and me. I smiled and the flash went off again.
At two, the DJ stopped played and everyone started filing out. Lucky for me, I didnt pay to get in (rep of MSA president...all president goes in for free) if not I would be really upset that I was in for only an hour.
Anyway, while heading towards the exit, I spotted a friend of mine. He must be a little high because he gave me a peck on the cheek. Not that I mind, but I think he did that on purpose. You know, alcohol helps you give in to your inhibitions. I wanted to see if he did the same to Ms R, but she was too distracted talking about something.
I also spotted PeterZ, a OK director/producer/actor/composer/everything else in the film industry wearing a silver coat and looking wild. He waved at my direction but I dont think he saw me. Yes, I do know him and I got his picture...damn, but he's so cute...and so young for his achievements he has made...
Later, I spotted another friend (working partner) of mine. He had a beer bottle in his hand. So we just took a picture. "Dont put it on facebook," he warned.
At last, I reached home at two plus, exhausted and a little happy to have attended Panam.
In fact, its sooo good, people have to wait in line for more than half an hour just to enter.
Friday Night. Panam Twin Party.
My friends and I went as triplets just coz we could. We were wearing a tube top and a bareback cheong sam top. With jeans.
I was wearing slippers...while the two were wearing shoes.
Since the two friends of mine were watching Borat for free in the Union, we ended up reaching the party at 12 plus...and we didnt get in until ONE a.m....My toes were freezing...and numbed. I tried rubbing them with my feet but they remained cold. Plus, I was wearing a weave sweater so when the wind blows, my entire body shivered. I swear I must be the dumbest person in my group but hey, I wasnt ready to risk my other jackets to the mercy of the cigeratte smoke smell.
At first, the four pretty girls (one from japan) thought we could go in asap, since my friend, Ms R, had lots of connections. However, it turns out we have to push ourselves in. We ignored the long line gathering outside and strode towards the door. Unfortunately, there was only one line. The fast lane had closed. It turns out that the club had reached its maximum capacity. Thus, unless some people were going home, all of the latecomers were destined to wait outside...with or without our coat, and with or without shoes.
Thus, we got in after half an hour with only one hour left to spare for dancing. The dance floor was so crowded, you could barely pushed yourself forward. There were two stage. We danced on top of one, only because it is a known fact that you get more space up there and thus, more privacy. Of course, we werent facing the dance floor, we were hidden by another 4 lines of people dancing and were facing the drinking section, which had piles of bottles piled up. A photographer walked past, taking pictures of anyone. He turned his camera towards me, and there was a flash of light. Another time, he motioned for my partner and me. I smiled and the flash went off again.
At two, the DJ stopped played and everyone started filing out. Lucky for me, I didnt pay to get in (rep of MSA president...all president goes in for free) if not I would be really upset that I was in for only an hour.
Anyway, while heading towards the exit, I spotted a friend of mine. He must be a little high because he gave me a peck on the cheek. Not that I mind, but I think he did that on purpose. You know, alcohol helps you give in to your inhibitions. I wanted to see if he did the same to Ms R, but she was too distracted talking about something.
I also spotted PeterZ, a OK director/producer/actor/composer/everything else in the film industry wearing a silver coat and looking wild. He waved at my direction but I dont think he saw me. Yes, I do know him and I got his picture...damn, but he's so cute...and so young for his achievements he has made...
Later, I spotted another friend (working partner) of mine. He had a beer bottle in his hand. So we just took a picture. "Dont put it on facebook," he warned.
At last, I reached home at two plus, exhausted and a little happy to have attended Panam.
Am I or not Mom's Girl
Sometimes, I think that it's impossible. Hahaha. Hmm...I wonder why am I laughing. Its a sadistic laugh, if you would care to know. (S.W., its like a tag game that never ends and i dont know what to make of it.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On a heavier note, I just watched Girls out Loud! Hahahaha. The last GLO video on youtube.com, of course. Thank you youtube!!!
Been thinking, (after watching Wendy and her mom) how much do I really know my mom, or how much does my mom knows me? Relatively little, I supposed. How much do you know a child who has moved out since she was 16 and is still living out on her world?
It's easy to say, "Hey, I moved out and my mom still knows me pretty well."
Whatever.
Truth is, I dont communicate...or even make an effort...I just live my life...and yes, I am a very lousy person/daughter (though I dont wanna admit it).
Why?
Simple. It's because I just never did! There are few types of personality out there. Mine can be considered, "The silent/private/everything confidential type".
Even before I was 16, communication between parents was restricted to ...
"Have you done your homework?"
"Yes."
"Any test?"
"No."
"Eaten already?"
"Yea."
Or...
"Mommy, I want..."
"No/Yes."
"I am going out tomorrow..."
"With who?"
"Friends."
"Who lah? Names."
"Friends."
After moving out...
"Have you eaten?"
"Yes."
"What did you eat?"
"Fish, meat, rice."
"What are you doing now?"
"Nothing."
"What do you do during weekends?"
"Nothing."
"Can you please tell me something?"
"Huh? Nothing."
The best part is...whatever I dont tell her...is traveled through the gossip line between my aunts and grandma....of course, I never knew what they say, but HECK! It doesnt matter to me. I am always in my room anyway or outside with some friend(s).
Of course, everything I tell my mom, is a white lie. Very simple, easy, effective and annoying. I dont tell her anything because she would want to know more, and like all parents who would want to know more and ask more, I get very quick tempered when questioned...especially questions that annoy me...like..."What did you eat?"
I tried to make an effort once...to communicate. I was 18. The first time leaving home and being surrounded by absolute strangers who speak only chinese or malay. Mother was worried, as usual. "Call me everyday," She said.
Me, being the filial daughter, obeyed. I called her unfailing every single night for approximately 2-4 weeks??? The questions again were mundane..."What did you eat?" Etc, etc, etc. Each night, I am confronted with the same question until one day...my friend said in chinese..."Eh, I know what you and your mom always talk about. Always what you eat wan."
I realized the stupidity of calling and since then, I stopped calling. It was a waste of money.
Up till now, I never called home. And I make excuses not to call home, because I didnt want to talk to them. They never called me either. I dont mind. In fact, I quite like it.
So now, five years after moving out...what does my mom or even my family knows about me?
Nothing. Nothing but a little girl, who once goes to school in the remote country called SP, who loves to read and eat xiao bai chai and cheesecakes and indulges herself in anything sweet. Who loves ice-skating and ... keeping silent.
I wonder if all the information is enough to withstand the ravages of time.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On a heavier note, I just watched Girls out Loud! Hahahaha. The last GLO video on youtube.com, of course. Thank you youtube!!!
Been thinking, (after watching Wendy and her mom) how much do I really know my mom, or how much does my mom knows me? Relatively little, I supposed. How much do you know a child who has moved out since she was 16 and is still living out on her world?
It's easy to say, "Hey, I moved out and my mom still knows me pretty well."
Whatever.
Truth is, I dont communicate...or even make an effort...I just live my life...and yes, I am a very lousy person/daughter (though I dont wanna admit it).
Why?
Simple. It's because I just never did! There are few types of personality out there. Mine can be considered, "The silent/private/everything confidential type".
Even before I was 16, communication between parents was restricted to ...
"Have you done your homework?"
"Yes."
"Any test?"
"No."
"Eaten already?"
"Yea."
Or...
"Mommy, I want..."
"No/Yes."
"I am going out tomorrow..."
"With who?"
"Friends."
"Who lah? Names."
"Friends."
After moving out...
"Have you eaten?"
"Yes."
"What did you eat?"
"Fish, meat, rice."
"What are you doing now?"
"Nothing."
"What do you do during weekends?"
"Nothing."
"Can you please tell me something?"
"Huh? Nothing."
The best part is...whatever I dont tell her...is traveled through the gossip line between my aunts and grandma....of course, I never knew what they say, but HECK! It doesnt matter to me. I am always in my room anyway or outside with some friend(s).
Of course, everything I tell my mom, is a white lie. Very simple, easy, effective and annoying. I dont tell her anything because she would want to know more, and like all parents who would want to know more and ask more, I get very quick tempered when questioned...especially questions that annoy me...like..."What did you eat?"
I tried to make an effort once...to communicate. I was 18. The first time leaving home and being surrounded by absolute strangers who speak only chinese or malay. Mother was worried, as usual. "Call me everyday," She said.
Me, being the filial daughter, obeyed. I called her unfailing every single night for approximately 2-4 weeks??? The questions again were mundane..."What did you eat?" Etc, etc, etc. Each night, I am confronted with the same question until one day...my friend said in chinese..."Eh, I know what you and your mom always talk about. Always what you eat wan."
I realized the stupidity of calling and since then, I stopped calling. It was a waste of money.
Up till now, I never called home. And I make excuses not to call home, because I didnt want to talk to them. They never called me either. I dont mind. In fact, I quite like it.
So now, five years after moving out...what does my mom or even my family knows about me?
Nothing. Nothing but a little girl, who once goes to school in the remote country called SP, who loves to read and eat xiao bai chai and cheesecakes and indulges herself in anything sweet. Who loves ice-skating and ... keeping silent.
I wonder if all the information is enough to withstand the ravages of time.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)