Bad Influence

I think I am under a very bad influence.

Very bad.

Everytime I am around him, I feel depressed. I feel unmotivated. I feel tired. I feel sleepy. I feel lazy. I feel alone. I feel abandoned. I feel like the world stopped.

Everytime I walk out of his shadow, I feel depressed, but only for a while. Then, I am back to my usual cheerpy self. Everytime I see someone happy, I feel happy. It takes away my black mood and restores me to my usual self. I am back on my own path, own dreams, own hopes. The world is no longer against me. It is with me, it is for me, it is mine to conquer.

I used to be the cheerpy one, until I met him, and then it was all downfall. Down through the drains, down through the pipes, down into the sewage, down out to the sea...

I think I influenced him with my happiness. He took it all away, sucked me dry, and left me shriveled and wrinkled.

I used to love my world, and everything in it. I loved it so much. I didnt feel bothered by it. I was living in my dream world.

I know I can get it back - my dream world. I know I can achieve it. I can do it....

It is up to me...to get my life back in order. It is up to me to make myself happy again.

It is my life I am risking. It is my life I am putting on the line.

I have to do focus. I have a plan.

There is only one thing to do.

1) Love myself.